Blog a la Cart

Disney a la Cart

For the past week, James and I have been working on a video to thank James’ parents for a wonderful trip to Florida, complete with inaugural Disney adventure. After completing the tribute to our vacation, we edited the video down into a shorter version to share in this space. It’s a quick look at the laughter and magic that transpired in The Happiest Place on Earth. (I would say that that slogan is true, with the caveat that at times, it is also The Most Miserable Place on Earth (think tantrumming, misbehaving children, price points that are highway robbery, and lines that will leave you grey haired and wrinkled)). Such is the price of Disney, and, I admit, it was well worth it.

I’ll do a longer post next week recapping how we tackled a trip to Disney World with a preschooler and toddler, and offer up some suggestions and recommendations that were incredibly helpful. In the meantime, Happy Weekend to all!

The Sunny Side // 3

Yesterday morning, I awoke Sunny with an enthusiastic, “HAPPY SPRING!”

She wearily looked outside at the delightful wintry mix of death and indignantly declared, “Mommy, it is absolutely NOT spring. There is ice and snow everywhere.”

Later that afternoon, while selecting her painting to share with all of you, she chose this one, stating, “Mama, THIS is what spring is supposed to look like.”

Amen to that, sister.

The Sunny Side // 2

“I’ve never seen a blue flower in real life, so I made one.”

Key Largo // 2014

I’m starting backward by sharing a glimpse at our time in the Keys at James’ parents’ Florida home. We try to visit once a winter (see past trips here, here and here). You’ll see there are some very common themes from year to year. Namely: swimming, ice cream cones, golf carts, fish, pools, air boat rides, alligators, smoothies and bathing suits.

New experiences this year included paddle boating next to Malia and Sasha Obama and their merry band of Secret Service agents (alas, no pictures to prove it). The Obamas were vacationing at the same time and place as us Carts, and while I never saw Michelle or Barack, I was pretty dang excited to have Malia walk by us on the dock and place her hands gently on Courtland’s shoulders to move her aside so she could make it past us without knocking the toddler into the water.

Yeah, I may have started whisper-squealing to the girls who had ZERO idea what was going on. One day I’ll explain the time that we shared an artificial body of water with the First Daughters in big plastic boats.

James and I even snuck in a fancy-pants date night thanks to James’ parents. As James declared 20 minutes in to dinner, “It’s so weird to be able to eat my food at a normal pace. And not have to cajole and shovel bites into another person’s face. Can I feed you a mouthful of your meal to feel more at home?”

hashtagparenthoodproblems

Needless to say, it was a very relaxing couple days in warm weather and sun.

Currently Reading

And so I hold back when we talk on the phone, sometimes. I ask questions, I listen, and I make silent wishes for you. I wish for simple things, like an easy delivery and a healthy baby. I also wish for things that will happen on their own in due time, whether I wish them or not (but I do it anyway): like a good night’s sleep, and new friendships with other moms, and a pair of jeans that fit again.

Unless you ask, I don’t give advice. And when you ask, I find myself saying things like,“Well, there are lots of different ways to think about it” or “I think everyone is different, so it depends on what you believe,” which I realize is completely frustrating when all you want to know is The Answer. And then I make another silent wish that you discover as soon as possible that there is no one right answer.

I wish that as you read the books and listen to the nurses and your mom and your mother-in-law — all of whom have wisdom but none of whom have the answer — you will also read your baby and listen to your heart. That combination of looking outward for information and inward for intuition is magical, I have found.

I wish that when you find yourself clinging to The Rules — of feeding, or sleep schedules, or developmental milestones, or anything else we’re supposed to Learn All The Things About — you understand that those rules are meant to give you structure, to educate you, to guide you, and the world will not fall apart if you choose to throw them out the window.

I would like to claim this as my own and send it around to all my first time expecting friends and new moms.

She’s captured my thoughts exactly. And even has me daydreaming about a family greater than four.

Thank the Universe for IUDs that prevent impulse decision making!

Read the full post here.

The Sunny Side // 1

As I’ve mentioned, Sunny is our budding artiste. She spends all of her free play at school standing by an easel. We come home with a fresh stack of paintings daily. Her teacher commented today, “Pretty soon you’ll be able to wallpaper your whole house!”

Sunny is as enamored with my friend Katie’s gorgeous illustration work as I am, and this evening, as we were once again awestruck watching one of her creatures unfold before our eyes, Sunny inquired:

Mommy, can I do that?

Do what, sweetie?

Show other people my art?

And lo, The Sunny Side was born. Expect many rainbow explosions, and flowers, and butterflies, and hearts. I am proud and happy to indulge one of my children’s true passions, however fleeting it may be. First up, we present: Polka Dot Dance

Frozen

That time when Kristen Anderson-Lopez ’94 (and her husband, Tony) agreed to host a sing-a-long of Frozen songs as part of the Williams Reunion program and the Cart Household nearly combusted with joy and star-struckness.

She even signed her email to me with an xo.

That’s my kind of woman.

Yeah, we’re geeking out over here. In a big way.

My day job is (primarily) to run the Williams College June Reunion program. Think 16 weddings. Two nights in a row. Simultaneously. With over 3,000 bodies.

It is a massive undertaking and I rely on the help of so many people and departments and alumni volunteers to make it happen year after year. It’s always incredible the way it unfolds and comes together into a truly joyous display. People are just so dang happy (er, most of them. There are always ALWAYS grumpy gooses and squeaky wheels in the mix, but of the thousands on campus, they are well in the minority).

I am always so grateful and heartened by the enthusiastic and quick replies I receive from alumni who I invite to present or be a part of the larger reunion program. I try to select alums whose work or life story will resonate broadly, as we have 26 year olds through 94 year olds to entertain.

For instance, I’ve had the immense privilege of welcoming the Besser brothers together on stage (Dr. Mitch Besser ’76, founder of Mothers to Mothers, and Dr. Rich Besser ’81, ABC News’s Chief Health and Medical editor)  to talk about their phenomenal careers in medicine and public health while seated next to Annie Lennox, Mitch’s wife.

This year, a number of successful Ephs in a reunion cycle are on the front lines of pop culture. Sebastian Arcelus ’99, who plays Lucas Goodwin in House of Cards, is going to come nerd out with his former advisors from Williams (a prof in the theater department and a prof in the polisci department) to talk about the show, its impact, its critiques, its reception. And, as I mentioned, Kristen and her husband are going to conduct a sing-a-long and talk about the music from Frozen, their writing process, their inspiration, led by one of Kristen’s former music professors.

These people are so warm and approachable and enthusiastic, and I love that about being a member of the Williams family. We are so good and generous and kind to our fellow Ephs. And there is a trust and respect that so readily welcomes people back, even at the height of huge moments in their careers or lives. Given that I’ve been buried in prep work for this year’s reunion, and have yet to sit down and even look at photos from our trip to Florida, I wanted to pause and acknowledge the parts of my job that I so adore, that I find so special and unique. I don’t often write about my day job so explicitly in this space, but the past two weeks has been remarkable when it comes to the connections and generosity of spirit I’ve experienced firsthand.

I am so looking forward to June. You better believe my girls will be rocking their Ella Dynae costumes to sing their hearts out with Kristen and her family.

In the middle of this shoot, Sunny looked at me and declared, “Mommy, I know that the snow and cold doesn’t bother Elsa. But it bothers me!” This was a very quick attempt to capture the costumes in the snow. Elsa costume available from Ella Dynae designs here.

Pardon the pajama pants under the costume. Kaki refused to take them off when she heard we were going out in the snow. Anna costume available from Ella Dynae designs here.

Kimmy & Gladdy

It’s been incredibly meaningful to watch Kimmy connect with our Gladdy Goose, as Kimmy was one of Ursa’s favorite humans in all the world, and it would seem that she is quickly becoming one of Gladden’s. No surprises there. Kimmy visited for an all-too-brief 48 hours last week before jetting to Bermuda for her spring break. Ya know, James is Bermudian, and yet I’ve only ever been to the island twice. Kimmy has found her way there four times. Not that I’m keeping track, JAMES.

Anyway! We returned from 10 days away to a nearly adult-sized dog with the spirit of a puppy still in full force. She’s in that gangly, awkward, glorious adolescent phase of lanky limbs and a total lack of bodily awareness. Her feathers are just starting to come in, so we’re getting a glimpse of the stunning animal that shall be when truly full grown.

She and Hanna shared a run at the vet’s office while we were away. And apparently they slept piled right on top of each other every night. While they’ll share a dog bed, or curl up on the floor side by side at home, they rarely pig pile. We were relieved to hear that they provided one another not only entertainment but companionship while we were away.

Gladden continues to grow into an ever more delightful creature. So cuddly. And sweet. And dang endearing. If you stop moving for more than 10 seconds, she’ll instantly turn your foot or lap into a pillow. I’ve never lived with a dog so snuggly, and I can’t say I mind it one bit (save for perhaps in the wee hours of the morning when we’re battling for room on the bed.)

We were devastated to learn right before our trip to Florida that Gladden’s mother, who had only just turned five year old, had died suddenly due to cancer. Unlike with Ursa, there were no clear signs until it was far too late, and despite the breeder’s best efforts, Gabby died on the table during surgery. And, only a month before that, Gladden’s father had also died in a similar fashion from cancer (at age 10). This is scary (although perhaps not completely unexpected) news given what we went through with Ursa. In deciding to get another Flat Coat, we sought out a breeder who was focused on health and longevity above show standards and aesthetics. But, there are no guarantees, and while this doesn’t ensure that Gladden will get cancer, we are acutely aware that that road may once again be in our (perhaps not too distant) future. We are so desperately smitten with Flat Coats that James and I have accepted that cancer and all its ugliness is a very real consequence of this breed, and we will continue to work diligently with the Flat Coat community to do what we can to avoid it and create a healthier breed. If you or a family member has allergies, it’s important to find out the dog breeds that won’t trigger allergies before bringing a new pet into your home.

Ursa has been on my mind a great deal, likely because of this news. And I’ve found myself daily aching for her presence. People claim that time heals all wounds, and that is complete and total bullshit. While the pain and absence may not be as acute or all-consuming, it is just as deep and palpable. I will mourn the loss of that dog for the rest of my life. And that’s not intended to be histrionic, but a truth about death and grief. People find their own ways to manage it, but it never really goes away. Not ever.

I’m grateful for the love that I’ve found in Gladdy, but it will never heal the space in my heart for Ursa.

The more you let love in, the more you have to lose. And yet, it’s worth it. Every time.

11/52

“A portrait of my children, once a week, every week, in 2014.”

Sunny: She loves to stage epic make believe scenarios with her sister. Vacation. Picnic. Birthday party. Frozen. Those are the four most common scenes. Our downstairs bathroom apparently makes a wonderful airplane. I’m really loving this age. Her mind works in such refreshing and beautiful ways.
Kaki: Inevitably, whenever we try to time a nap with a car ride, she falls asleep 10 minutes from our destination, destroying any hopes of a decent nap and thus a happy, rested kid. I am so looking forward to the day when our children’s moods are not beholden to mid-day naps. FREEDOM!

More details about The 52 Project here. To view all the portraits in the series visit here.

Anna & Elsa

This morning, we were quite literally, in the actual, literal definition of the word, frozen into our home. Pots of boiling tea kettles were ferried out to our cars to defrost the door handles. Great scrapping and salting and enduring wild, frigid winds consumed our Thursday morning. March in New England, y’all. What an asshole.

Such a stark contrast to our lives just a week ago in sunny Florida. While I still have visions of capturing the girls wearing these completely handmade and breathtaking beautiful (and accurate) Anna and Elsa costumes by the crazy talented Richelle of Ella Dynae Designs in snowy climes, I couldn’t resist sharing these images I snapped of the girls on our last morning at Disney World wandering around The Grand Floridian. (Richelle created Sunny’s amazing Lilac Fairy costume for her fourth birthday).

The Frozen costumes were intended to arrive at the start of our trip as a surprise for the girls, but due to some set backs with our hotel, we didn’t receive them until Monday afternoon. Fortunately, we had one amazing evening in the Magic Kingdom in full costume, where people stopped us left and right to swoon over these truly stunning creations. (Far more impressive than the itchy, cheaply made Anna and Elsa costumes on the shelves of all the Disney World shops). Let’s count the reasons visitors flock to Orlando. There are the endless theme parks, the sprawling convention center, the abundance of world-class golf courses nearby, and proximity to the Kennedy Space Center. Whatever the reason you might go, you’ve got a lot of company: In 2016, 68 million visitors descended upon the area, spending $41.8 billion on lodging, entertainment, and dining, making it the top tourist destination in the U.S. Refer to This Article to find the best Orlando’s Restaurants.

The girls would wear these costumes day and night if we let them. And who could blame them? They create a living fairytale.

They’ll be many more images to come – I have hopes that the temperatures will rise enough to capture the girls outside in some snow before it all turns to hideous mud and muck. But for now, enjoy this initial peek into their fantasy world. As is at the heart of Frozen, the love between sisters is a powerful one indeed.

Purchase the Elsa costume here. And the Anna costume here.