Blog a la Cart

During Ursa’s decline, a reader sent me a link to Dr. Jill McDevitt’s blog, A Day in the Life of a Sexologist, specifically recommending I check out this post. Which you should all do. Immediately.

I’ve been a reader ever since.

When the Miley Cyrus/VMA brouhaha exploded all over the Interwebs, the only reaction I saw that made me not want to hide my daughters in a bubble was from Dr. Jill. It read:

Dear Society,

If you think a woman in a tan vinyl bra and underwear, grabbing her crotch and grinding up on a dance partner is raunchy, trashy, and offensive but you don’t think her dance partner is raunchy, trashy, or offensive as he sings a song about “blurred” lines of consent and propagating rape culture, then you may want to reevaluate your acceptance of double standards and your belief in stereotypes about how men vs. women “should” and are “allowed” to behave.
Sincerely,

Dr. Jill

Further, yesterday, The Society Pages shared this post linking images from Project Unbreakable with the lyrics to Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines, disturbingly demonstrating direct correlation between the language rapists use toward survivors with the language embedded in a mainstream pop song.

Look, I found myself bopping around to Blurred Lines the first few times I heard it on the radio, but as I began processing the actual words to the song, a growing sense of nausea and disgust and actual fear and concern for my daughters was omnipresent. Do not underestimate the power of that song to influence the way men and women think about sexual relationships, in really dangerous and imbalanced ways. Just as I turn off any Chris Brown or Rihanna song that comes on the radio for reasons related to male/female relationships, domestic abuse, and general piss poor role modeling, Robin Thicke has joined the list of musicians who I will not tolerate being played, especially in the presence of my daughters.

We, as listeners and thus consumers of this music, have more power than you may think. Let’s use it wisely and to help rather than further erode healthy, consensual relationships.

*Whew! Steps down off soap box.*