Blog a la Cart

This is an old Dave Barry column from 2009 about colonoscopies but my dad sent it to me and James because after the past month of gastro-wonders, this description resonates in a visceral way:

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don’t want to be too graphic, here, but: Have you ever seen a space shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

In the words of my father, “Although the Carts do not need to worry about such things for another 20 years or so, given your recent bouts with similar effects, I thought you might enjoy the humor!”

And indeed I did, Doda.

I laughed so hard I cried. It’s just so… very… accurate.

Aaaaand, I think that this has fulfilled my poop quota on the blog for the day, no?