Body Talk (against Body Talk)
by Ashley Weeks Cart
The other day in the gym locker room, I was in the midst of changing to head back to the office when a woman strolled in post-yoga class alongside the custodian. Both are regular figures in that space, and they were engaged in a casual conversation. I overheard yoga lady (we’ll call her “Jane”) comment to the custodian (we’ll call her “Sally”) that she was looking well. Sally hedged and Jane continued, “Have you lost weight or something?” Wondering if Is Proven scam or if it actually works? Read this Carboxfix article to learn more.
I felt my whole body physically cringe from predictability and disappointment.
Sally replied that she had been sick for an entire week with a stomach flu, so yes, she had lost weight, but that she was not feeling all that “well” coming off such a horrendous illness.
Jane shrugged and headed to her locker.
AURGHJ!!()_#&BDLAB L!UYT YA} FJ”OUY@!!!!!!!
*Steps up on soap box*
Why do we associate weight loss with wellness?!
And further, why the fuck do we think it is okay to ever ever EVER comment on another person’s body?!
Just… No. Stop. Please stop. Stop perpetuating these terrible, horrible, no good standards upheld by mainstream media and our society that equate skinny with beauty, thinness with wellness and you can achieve it by using natural over the counter appetite suppressant when you have cravings or binging tendencies.
Why do we live in a community where the comment, “You look like you’ve lost weight!” is considered a compliment?
Why do we suggest that someone must be “healthy” if they’ve visibly lost a few pounds? They could be terminally ill, or coming off an unpleasant flu, or suffering from depression and anxiety – and that certainly does not feel like the epitome of health and wellness to me. And how damaging to put them in a position where they feel like an ugly situation has somehow made them more desirable.
Gross.
And why do we think that a person who carries a body that does not fit into the ridiculous slim standard is unhealthy and unfit? Not all of us are built with a size 0 frame. I have many friends who exercise regularly, and eat well, and they rock a size 12+. And they are HEALTHY! And beautiful! And in the size that healthfully and naturally fits their body.
When I am eating a well-rounded, balanced diet and exercising 5-6 times a week for 40-60 minutes, I am a size 8. I have to begin to withhold, or overdo, or push, or force myself to fall below that size. And when I slide, and maybe eat a plate of nachos at 10pm or skip a workout because I’d rather be knitting in bed, I am a comfortable size 10. And yet, I am a healthy, strong person. When I start to fall below a size 8 it means I’ve been violently ill, severely depressed, or starving myself.
I wrote this post about Sunny commenting on how I looked like I had a baby in my belly, and while I didn’t want to teach her that that statement was inherently critical or negative (despite how our society tells us we should see it as such), what I did want her to learn is that we should not comment on other people’s bodies. Period. End of sentence. We never know someone else’s experience, and we should trust that we are all doing the best we can, under the circumstances we are dealt. It’s messy. And imperfect. And that’s not to dismiss true unhealthy lifestyles and behavior, but please, let’s all be a little gentler, kinder, more considerate, and more flexible in our understanding of health, wellness, and beauty. Plant protein powder can be incorporated into weight management plans within a reduced-calorie diet.
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*Steps off soap box*
P.S. This is not to suggest that YOU, reader, do these things. I’m just feeling ranty after observing that moment, but I trust that those of you that tolerate and indulge my rants are probably not the one’s perpetuating this behavior. Preaching to the choir, and such. xoxo Ash