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This morning, you ostensibly declared that there is no use or place for a father in a newborn’s life. Men, as you say, “lack the plumbing” to care for an infant, so why would any man take paternity leave? It’s just a free vacation.

Yes, because I know of no more relaxing activity than being steeped in bodily fluids and sleep deprivation, which is the hallmark of life following the birth of a child. Why would a woman need the support of her partner and co-parent during such a calm and predictable time in her family’s life?

Men can’t breastfeed, you say, so why on earth would a man need to be with his wife in the days following the arrival of his child. Diaper changes, and laundry, and disrupted sleep schedules, and soothing a disgruntled baby, and completely overhauling and redefining one’s life and priorities is not the work of men.

Right.

Not to mention the bonding and connection that is so fleeting and central to those early days with new human life. Why would a father need to be a part of that?

Your suggestion that a man should “force” his wife to have a C-section so that he wouldn’t have to miss work, for me, takes the cake. You do realize that a C-section is major abdominal surgery? But it’s completely reasonable to cut open a woman’s body in the name of nine innings of baseball? Thank goodness it’s an option in an emergency, but it should never be the standard mode of delivering a child. Putting aside the fact that scheduling a C-section risks delivering a child prematurely (and thus all the corresponding risks of premature delivery), it is a major risk and recovery for the mother, who must then adapt to caring for her child in the moments following the surgery. But yes, let’s please complicate a mother’s life further, she’s got the “plumbing” for it.

Worst of all, you are all husbands and fathers yourselves. You are teaching your daughters that this is how they can expect to be treated by their partners, as bodies to be sliced open and used for plumbing, and your sons that they are unnecessary players in the development of their future children’s lives.

Fathers of the Year, you three!

FEELING ALL THE FEELINGS,

Ashley Weeks Cart
Mother, Wife, Sister, Daughter, Human Being, Feeler of Feelings

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As a contrast to the embarrassing and blood-boiling claims by Boomer Esiason, Craig Carton and Mike Francesca, I must applaud the comments of the Mets general manger Sandy Alderson, who defended Daniel Murphy’s decision to be with his wife and newborn baby and miss two games of baseball:  ‘The paternity-leave policy was introduced not just for the players’ benefit, but recognition by clubs in contemporary times that this is an appropriate time for parents to be together… I’ve got absolutely no problem whatsoever with Murph being away… I’m happy he was able to be with his wife.”

For more on the statements that incited this rant visit here.