Blog a la Cart

XXII

Hi, Mom,

It’s hard to believe that you have been absent for all these moments. And yet, look at all this love… you are so clearly a part of that.

143 Your Ashley

Sunny & Sander

The Double Big Sister doing what she does best, love her family. In this case, her baby brother. She is so unbelievably sweet with Sanderling. This video reminds me of her with newborn Courtland, when she was only 2! She truly delights in baby handling. On Friday, she didn’t have school, so she spent a hour letting Sander nap on her chest.

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Oh my heart.

Welcoming Maisie

It took us over four months, but James and I finally finished compiling the video of our sweet Fairy Goddaughter’s birth in time to gift to Courtland’s FGPs for Christmas. This labor was so quick and smooth that the video required only one song to capture the labor, delivery and wonderful postpartum bonding. In fact, I think James’ timing of the delivery in the video is actually longer than the IRL version.

Regardless, I was humbled and awed and inspired to be with people I consider family during these precious, vulnerable, life-altering moments. And I’m so happy to share a piece of the magic with all of you.

Currently Watching

I began my morning watching this TED talk, “The US needs paid family leave – for the sake of its future,” and I urge you too to watch it and pass along.

As I contemplate my family’s upcoming parental leave, I recognize that I am one of those 12% of families in this country that have the luxury of paid leave. But it shouldn’t be a luxury. I shouldn’t feel lucky that my husband and I get paid time off from work to heal and bond and nurture postpartum. In fact, though I recognize that by US standards my four months of paid leave, and my husband’s four months of leave (2 months paid, 2 months unpaid) are unbelievably generous, I am still critical of how limited this time is during such a fleeting yet crucial stage in a person’s life (mother, baby and partner alike). An investment and commitment to breastfeeding alone is enough to warrant a minimum of 6 months paid leave for all mothers given that solid food isn’t introduced until that time.

One of my dearest friends welcomed her first child into the world last month, and because she lives in Stockholm, she and her partner each receive 285 days of fully paid leave from work to be used however, and in whatever arrangement, they deem best for their family and their careers over the course of the baby’s first five years of life. Talk about empowering families and providing a work/life balance! And once they return to work, their child will have fully subsidized (read: free) childcare, so economics does not have to be the primary driver of their family’s decision-making.

As conveyed in this talk, the US is one of only 9 nations (all the rest of which are countries with fewer than 8 million people, as compared to the US’s 320 million) that do not offer paid family leave. If the rest of the world can figure out how to support new families, we sure as hell better be able to come up with a reasonable solution for our country.

It is long since time for the most powerful country on Earth to offer national paid leave to the people doing the work of the future of this country and to the babies who represent that future. Childbirth is a public good. This leave should be state-subsidized. It should have no exceptions for small businesses, length of employment or entrepreneurs. It should be able to be shared between partners.

Hello?

We have been singing Adele’s latest single ad nauseam chez Cart (I have a feeling our family is not alone in this). This SNL sketch absolutely killed me. While my family of liberal, Vermont socialists will likely be on the same page during Thanksgiving supper, we may just break out in song for the love of Adele.

Currently Watching

This is the talk I referenced last week by Kristen Anderson-Lopez (songwriter of Frozen). If you get a chance, I highly recommend you take the 15 minutes to watch it.

Currently Playing

Prepare to be mesmerized. Absolutely breathtaking…

Our Drama Queen

Courtland in action, wearing her new Elsa costume (“Frozen Fever” edition). Her key or pitch or *insert music lingo* could use some serious work, but she’s got heart.

Notice when she dramatically picks up a picture frame with Ursa’s photograph in it and sings, “I loved her when she was little… She died.”

Endless entertainment ’round here.

Steve & Justin

I’ve been meaning to share this story of our friends’ Steve and Justin’s real wedding.

The first same-sex wedding at the White House.

Jon’s telling of the story is wonderful. And I’m thrilled that it can finally be shared with the world.

Hurricane John Boehner

Thank you, Doda, for putting this on my radar.

YES! Love.