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Month: September, 2013

The Swedish Do Vermont

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Oh man. What a delightful visit. Sadly, I have next to no pictures to show for it as we were so caught up in one another that I barely lifted the lens. You can visit my Instagram for a handful of snaps.

We had such a glorious four days showing off our life in Vermont, from trips to our favorite restaurants, to hikes around the property, to egg collection, to apple picking, to cider donut consumption, to barn dancing, to museum visits, to kale soup making, to just lying around the house basking in one another’s company.

I love these two beautiful, kind, amazing people so very much.

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And my favorite, nightly bed time stories in Swedish for the girls.

Blurred Lines

During Ursa’s decline, a reader sent me a link to Dr. Jill McDevitt’s blog, A Day in the Life of a Sexologist, specifically recommending I check out this post. Which you should all do. Immediately.

I’ve been a reader ever since.

When the Miley Cyrus/VMA brouhaha exploded all over the Interwebs, the only reaction I saw that made me not want to hide my daughters in a bubble was from Dr. Jill. It read:

Dear Society,

If you think a woman in a tan vinyl bra and underwear, grabbing her crotch and grinding up on a dance partner is raunchy, trashy, and offensive but you don’t think her dance partner is raunchy, trashy, or offensive as he sings a song about “blurred” lines of consent and propagating rape culture, then you may want to reevaluate your acceptance of double standards and your belief in stereotypes about how men vs. women “should” and are “allowed” to behave.
Sincerely,

Dr. Jill

Further, yesterday, The Society Pages shared this post linking images from Project Unbreakable with the lyrics to Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines, disturbingly demonstrating direct correlation between the language rapists use toward survivors with the language embedded in a mainstream pop song.

Look, I found myself bopping around to Blurred Lines the first few times I heard it on the radio, but as I began processing the actual words to the song, a growing sense of nausea and disgust and actual fear and concern for my daughters was omnipresent. Do not underestimate the power of that song to influence the way men and women think about sexual relationships, in really dangerous and imbalanced ways. Just as I turn off any Chris Brown or Rihanna song that comes on the radio for reasons related to male/female relationships, domestic abuse, and general piss poor role modeling, Robin Thicke has joined the list of musicians who I will not tolerate being played, especially in the presence of my daughters.

We, as listeners and thus consumers of this music, have more power than you may think. Let’s use it wisely and to help rather than further erode healthy, consensual relationships.

*Whew! Steps down off soap box.*

37/52

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“A portrait of my children, once a week, every week, in 2013.”

Sunny: She started gymnastics this week because ballet and karate just weren’t being met with enthusiasm. She’s been requesting to do gymnastics for months, and given all the monkey-barring and somersaulting, we figured we’d oblige. We enrolled her in the preschool class, but after the first day, the instructor asked that we move her up to the kindergarten group because she did so well. It’s unbelievably fulfilling to see your child excited and thriving. For now, it seems that gymnastics is her thing. Given that she’ll probably be a gangly six foot plus in not too long, she may as well enjoy it while she still has the build for it!
Kaki: Topless dinners are pretty standard given this kid’s eating habits. These days, every activity is met with “MY DO!” which means messes are everywhere. All the time. Ah to be two.

More details about The 52 Project here. To view all the portraits in the series visit here.

Family Portrait

Honestly, Lars is rocking the shit out of that mustache.

Such a wonderful, whirlwind visit. Far too brief. But equally delightful.

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Glowing

James and I are coming down off a truly magnificent anniversary slash 30th birthday bash that we threw yesterday evening. They’ll be more to share later, but for now, this image sums up how we’re feeling.

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Sweden // 2013

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It’s been five months since my 30th birthday trip to Stockholm, and I am finally recapping the adventure. Shortly after my return, Ursa’s tumor resurfaced, and life, well, happened. Given that Maja, my dear dear friend whom I was visiting in April is arriving to Cartwheel Farm this afternoon with her beau, Lars (a fellow Swed whom she met while in New York City en route to my wedding five years ago – crazy right?), I thought it was high time to revisit the trip and share some recommendations for those planning a trip to Stockholm (a trip I HIGHLY recommend).

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^^This is the view from Maja and Lars’ apartment in Stockholm. (I KNOW! Swoon!) They live in the Lundagatan neighbor in Stockholm (which is where Lisbeth Salandar’s apartment was in the Girl with a Dragon Tattoo series. Very on trend, LasseMaja). What I love most about Stockholm is that it is a watery, walkable city. It’s a series of interconnected islands, and very very pedestrian friendly. I loved exploring (and training for my half marathon) by running around the water front of the city. Their apartment was on Södermalm island. For a look at the amazing, totally Scandinavian design of their flat, see this post.^^

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^^The night I arrived Maja spoiled me with a festively decorated American/Swedish pride dessert.^^

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^^Our first day we visited the Moderna Museet (Stockholm’s modern art museum). We walked (of course) and spent as much time enjoying lunch and lattes in the sunshine at the museum’s cafe and the wonders of the museum store as we did absorbing the artwork within. I highly recommend a visit.^^

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^^A lot of my time was consumed just oogling the beautiful cityscapes and leisurely exploring all the incredible shops and absorbing as much of the fashion and design as my brain could handle.^^

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^^While H&M and Ikea are the obvious Swedish shops to visit in their motherland, I highly recommend a stop at Granit. So much incredible, minimalist design for home and office.^^

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^^We did lots and lots of cafe lounging. In my opinion, there’s no better way to take in the spirit and vibe of a city. I loved the people watching and observing firsthand how truly family-friendly and remarkable a community there is in Stockholm. I am so envious of the Swedish approach to parenting.^^

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^^We visited Fotografiska, a photography museum perched right on the water front. I found it inspiring. On so very many levels. Anna Claren’s work spoke to me in particular. Do visit this gem of a museum if you’re ever in Stockholm.^^

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^^We spent time with Maja’s family. Her sister and her British husband, two children, a FLAT COAT! (I, obviously, was obsessed with him), and a hamster lived in an insanely amazing apartment in another part of the city. We spent a morning celebrating her nephew Max’s birthday.^^

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^^Later that evening, Swedish meatballs were consumed. Of course.^^

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^^Maja and Lars hosted a housewarming slash joint 30th Birthday bash with all their friends and family one night. It was such a special evening where I was able to have thoughtful and meaningful conversation with such a different and fascinating cultural perspective. I so appreciated the opportunity to really talk with Maja’s friends about everything from politics to parenting, pop culture to childbirth. And I fell even more in love with the Swedish approach to life. As though that were possible.^^

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^^Whenever possible, order yourself a kanelbulle (Swedish cinnamon bun) – you won’t regret it.^^

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^^My favorite trip was to the Artipelag (where I did this shoot for LasseMaja). Such a unique and gorgeous place. If you have a car, do take the 30 minute trip outside Stockholm to visit.^^

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^^And, there was plenty of time just spent goofing around Maja’s apartment, catching up and being together. A rare event that I can’t believe we’re duplicating twice in one year! I cannot wait to see these beauties this afternoon, and to dance our faces off this Sunday when James and I are throwing a Barnyard Dance in honor of our anniversary. Despite all the heartache of this past year, there has been so much joy as well.^^

MUST DO: Stockholm, SWEDEN

Artipelag: A modern art museum and architectural wonder housed out in the Swedish archipelago. INCREDIBLE!

Moderna Museet: Modern art museum in the heart of Stockholm.

Fotografiska: Photography museum with a gorgeous waterfront cafe.

– Eat a kanelbulle. Eat Swedish meatballs. Eat bilar (chewy candy cars) and proper Swedish fish.

– We had one fancy dinner out at B.A.R. Amazing seafood. Great atmosphere. Near the Moderna Museet. Relatively affordable (for Sweden). Two very enthusiastic thumbs up.

– Shop Granit, Design House Stockholm, & Other Stories, H&M (duh!), Byredo, The Malmsten Store & 10 Swedish Designers

– For kid’s awesomeness, shop Mini Rodini, Polarn O. Pyret & Geggamoja

And most of all, wander, stroll, window shop, and get lost along the waterfront parks throughout the city. I particularly recommend the Tantolunden park on Södermalm with its quaint “allotment gardens,” which are a series of mini-cottage/shack structures along the hillside that families own and use in the summer for gardening. Truly, it is adorable to behold.

Labor Day // 2013

Warning: The amount of “red” in this post may make your soul ache. Proceed with caution.

Yep, our usual Labor Day antics were celebrated despite our loss of Ursa Bear. It was extremely difficult to be out at James’ parent’s cabin, Ursa’s favorite place on Earth, without her. I spent some time that weekend alone, mournfully wandering around the lake and dramatically swimming fully clothed in the spot where I taught Ursa how to swim 8 years ago. Grief is not always a rational or pretty thing. James and I kept things very low key. No late nights dancing and partying it up as is a custom each Labor Day. Rather marinating in our loss and spending some quiet, meaningful time together as a family.

But, we couldn’t resist putting on our best red garb to participate in the annual Tomato War. If you’re new here, and the photos didn’t make it painfully obvious, we’re on the Red Army.

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^^More adorable than terrifying, but maybe that’s their secret weapon? Lulling the Black Army into suspicions that they pose no threat and then striking? Bueller?^^

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^^Uncle Ted, our fearless (adorable?) general.^^

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^^Sunny and her great-grandparents. An extremely special photo.^^

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^^You’ll see lots of attempts at these growling photos. Again, more adorable than terrifying, but we’re working on it.^^

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^^A group of recent college graduates. Doesn’t this image fill you with confidence for the future of our society?^^

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^^Day of war. Looking tough. And lipstick coated. The adults lost the war, but James led the kid’s Red Army to triumphant victory. So we’re calling it a win for our household.^^

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^^Family. I love the varied expressions of all four of these men, seasoned veterans of the Tomato War.^^

I miss her.

So so so much. My heart is heavy today for many reasons. Thinking of my Ursa. Thinking of my Devy-poo, the woman that has gone above and beyond to support me during my own loss, devastatingly because it is something that she understands better than most. And today, my heart is with her. Thinking about an innocence that was lost 12 years ago.

Hold those you love close, because you will never ever regret it.

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Martha’s Vineyard // 2013

Man, this feels like a lifetime ago. Our “big adventure” while on the Eastern part of Massachusetts was a trip solo, sans dependents, for me and James to Martha’s Vineyard. I had a work event, and so it was a nice excuse to spend a little extra time on island with James.

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^^Kimmy wrangled the girls while we were away.^^

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^^We (and by “we,” I mean James) took dramatic pictures of the sea and sky while on the ferry.^^

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^^Then James took very cool pictures of the tents at the work event we attended in Edgartown. Faculty lectures, cocktails, a lobster bake and a concert by this talented Eph were among the line-up of events.^^

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^^We then spent the night at our Vermont neighbor’s parents’ home on island. It’s a long, small-worldy, Eph-tastic tale, but essentially our neighbors in Vermont are the children of James’ grandfather’s best friend from Williams (yes, James’ grandfather (both of them, actually) are also Ephs). And this bestie just so happens to have a gorgeous property on the Vineyard. I know, we’re all so incestuous if we’re purple. Regardless, we had the pleasure of staying in their barn during our trip.^^

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^^We spent the morning all by ourselves at a private dock, enjoying a much needed dip in the sea.^^

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^^I couldn’t resist documenting the awesomeness of our accommodations, home of a solid night’s sleep. The first in a long while!^^

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^^While far too brief, it was nice to spend some time, with my partner, and not a dependent in sight. Granted, we talked about how much we missed said dependents nearly the entire time, but we appreciated the brief respite, too.^^

36/52

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“A portrait of my children, once a week, every week, in 2013.”

Sunny: A Sunday afternoon ride in the backpack.
Kaki: Life as a two-year old. Mess mess mess.

More details about The 52 Project here. To view all the portraits in the series visit here.